昨天翻箱倒柜把以前的各色文件过目了一遍，枯燥的数字居然把尘封往事给勾起了不少。
翻出2002年的w-2表，那年我们攒了好几张w-2，因为换了好几次工作，那时Daddy刚刚工作半年，公司就倒闭了，于是他在外面找些零工打打，我也在打杂，他的一个越南同事立马去McDonald 端盘子去了，人家四十好几的人，什么没经历过：革命，坐牢，逃难，移民……不惑了还跑去学计算机，没两年又遭泡沫，好在是单身一人，干什么不是干呢？
那三四个月里，Daddy每月挣1000，我800，那时只想着若是能长久这么发财下去，是件多么幸福的事情。就是这么点愿望也是山水重重，因为身份的问题。函函那时不过3岁，依旧上着她的半天学，依旧认为我们很有钱。
昨晚Daddy提到他们组在三藩招人，有想去那个很多美丽的歌中唱到的美丽的城市，可是因我的工作关系，不是说走就可以走的，那么再等个两三年吧，我们去？那儿房子买不起啊，就找condo好了。
我们是不是还年轻啊？
Thursday, June 28, 2007
Welcome to the Real World, honey
函函刚上 Kindergarten那会，她的同学，一金发碧眼的小姑娘问函函：Who are you voting for? 函函答道：Senator Kerry. 小姑娘则说：I'm voting for President Bush.
一年级时，函函给 President Bush 去了封信，好奇 what is the life in White House like? 过了个把月，得到一封回信和布什夫妇俩的合影照，照片有杂志那么大，小姑娘初初识文断字，认认真真的拜读了回信的全文。
最近 presidential campaign 又风声鹤唳，函函的朋友们又开始谈到：it's fun to be a President. 函函有点不屑：President Jefferson said all men are created equal, but he had slaves!
一年级时，函函给 President Bush 去了封信，好奇 what is the life in White House like? 过了个把月，得到一封回信和布什夫妇俩的合影照，照片有杂志那么大，小姑娘初初识文断字，认认真真的拜读了回信的全文。
最近 presidential campaign 又风声鹤唳，函函的朋友们又开始谈到：it's fun to be a President. 函函有点不屑：President Jefferson said all men are created equal, but he had slaves!
后现代生活
很久未通电话的闺蜜打来电话，还没聊几句，俺就怅怅然道：“你去看我的 blog 吧，就知道是怎么回事啦。”
搁下话筒，四顾好茫然……
需要跟 Daddy 晚上回家后共同对付一些documents. 先上 Instant Messenger, 敲：
me: I need go through some documents with you tonight
he: Ok
接着俺赶紧切换到 Outlook:
first click ‘make a new appointment‘, Subject: doc walk-thru, Location: home office, Start time: Thu 6/28/2007 9:00pm, End time: Thu 6/28/2007 9:30pm ;
then click ‘Invite Attendees‘, To: daddy-alias ;
and then click "Send".
又切回到IM, 噼里啪啦俺接着敲：
me: I just sent you a meeting invitation, pl accept it.
he: this is a good joke, buddy
me: lets get down to the business, partner.
半分钟后，俺收到一封 email titled 'Accepted: doc walk-thru'.
搁下话筒，四顾好茫然……
需要跟 Daddy 晚上回家后共同对付一些documents. 先上 Instant Messenger, 敲：
me: I need go through some documents with you tonight
he: Ok
接着俺赶紧切换到 Outlook:
first click ‘make a new appointment‘, Subject: doc walk-thru, Location: home office, Start time: Thu 6/28/2007 9:00pm, End time: Thu 6/28/2007 9:30pm ;
then click ‘Invite Attendees‘, To: daddy-alias ;
and then click "Send".
又切回到IM, 噼里啪啦俺接着敲：
me: I just sent you a meeting invitation, pl accept it.
he: this is a good joke, buddy
me: lets get down to the business, partner.
半分钟后，俺收到一封 email titled 'Accepted: doc walk-thru'.
零，粉拳
身为老二的妹妹，打出生起就得很努力地为自己争取权益。
“妹妹再吃三口饭”
“One!" 冲你伸出严监生的一根手指头
"Three!"
“One!" 依然保持一百年不变的姿态
"Two!"
"Ok, Two" 掰出了另一根手指
吃完不多不少满满两口之后，做妈的经常想趁其不备再塞一口半口的，总是被其警觉地发现，予以坚决地抵抗：“不吃了”， 这个时候她不是摇手表示“不，不要”， 而是伸出一个捏得紧紧的小拳头，并且一伸伸到你的鼻子底下，摇着，圆圆的拳头很像圆圆的 0.
第一次见到小拳头时，让我小小的吃惊了一把，要知道，全世界只有4个民族独立地 *发明* 了“零”，yeah, that's true, 你用罗马数字画个零给我看看， 这四个零是：阿拉伯人的“0"，印度人的__，中国人的“零”， and the other one 的__，我认为现在应该再加上一个 Melody J. W. 的小粉拳头。
麻烦哪位才子才女帮忙给完成上面的填空题？
“妹妹再吃三口饭”
“One!" 冲你伸出严监生的一根手指头
"Three!"
“One!" 依然保持一百年不变的姿态
"Two!"
"Ok, Two" 掰出了另一根手指
吃完不多不少满满两口之后，做妈的经常想趁其不备再塞一口半口的，总是被其警觉地发现，予以坚决地抵抗：“不吃了”， 这个时候她不是摇手表示“不，不要”， 而是伸出一个捏得紧紧的小拳头，并且一伸伸到你的鼻子底下，摇着，圆圆的拳头很像圆圆的 0.
第一次见到小拳头时，让我小小的吃惊了一把，要知道，全世界只有4个民族独立地 *发明* 了“零”，yeah, that's true, 你用罗马数字画个零给我看看， 这四个零是：阿拉伯人的“0"，印度人的__，中国人的“零”， and the other one 的__，我认为现在应该再加上一个 Melody J. W. 的小粉拳头。
麻烦哪位才子才女帮忙给完成上面的填空题？
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Just an Ordinary Morning
It was just another ordinary morning
You couldn't expect a thing.
Nothing was unusual or out of place
But then my alarm clock started to
Sing!
Father came in and opened the door
My, he had shrunk to my hip!
He had grown a ten-foot long beard,
And his nose was just a snip!
Mother came behind him,
Her hair was longer than
Rapunzel's!
It had turned purple and a million
Feet long,
It nearly reached a billion!
My room started shaking,
And everything was upside-down!
I was walking on the ceiling,
My pictures started to frown!
I was so surprised,
My sister was eleven!
My cat, usually nice and sweet,
Was suddenly very stubborn!
Then, there was a deafning BANG!
And everything was all right!
My sister was three again,
Dad regained his normal height.
But then my alarm clock started to sing.........
-by Hannah
You couldn't expect a thing.
Nothing was unusual or out of place
But then my alarm clock started to
Sing!
Father came in and opened the door
My, he had shrunk to my hip!
He had grown a ten-foot long beard,
And his nose was just a snip!
Mother came behind him,
Her hair was longer than
Rapunzel's!
It had turned purple and a million
Feet long,
It nearly reached a billion!
My room started shaking,
And everything was upside-down!
I was walking on the ceiling,
My pictures started to frown!
I was so surprised,
My sister was eleven!
My cat, usually nice and sweet,
Was suddenly very stubborn!
Then, there was a deafning BANG!
And everything was all right!
My sister was three again,
Dad regained his normal height.
But then my alarm clock started to sing.........
-by Hannah
一次革命记略
开场：
前任老板来email说他那有空缺了，问我有意否，当即答曰有，并作热情洋溢状。其实这to do or not to do, 对俺总是一个极大的人生考验。
是夜，端坐床头开始了又一轮的人生怀疑——
Daddy 的“有时，赚钱还是很重要”的语重心长没能打动我——这不是还在赚着嘛；
耳边回荡着对函函的耳提面命：“越努力，你得到的自由就越多”也没能激发我——谁说的马列主义口朝外是小朋友的专长呢？
一个半小时过后，俺的思路终于给扶上了正轨，俺终于给自己找到了一丝动力：你想啊，我若是去折腾折腾，回来就有的可写了。
于是释然，拍拍身旁这位贤弟的肩膀，毅然决然道：愚兄决定会~他一会。
于是贤弟很贤惠地把俺 gmail+blogger的帐号封杀了。接下来是大家将要看到的，所谓：网上的风平浪静，网下的风雨欲来。
第一周：一个无产者的光辉形象
很没脑子的，俺把 screen 安排在周五下午3：30，明知自己患有严重的周五下午综合症，当时为何如此犯浑，现在已无从考据。当我形象悲惨的现身面试官跟前，一脸的沧桑一脑的糊浆，外带嘴角的水泡闪亮登场，接下来的故事就不用一一向人民汇报了吧，只记得当考官谆谆诱之导之，我终于醍醐灌顶，大家终于松一口气，我说：why didn't you just say so? 很nice 的人儿便很有些歉然了。
第二周：革命生产两不误
每天晚上很本分的挤出一个小时来看书，周末更是全天的用功。就是这样俺囫囵完了一本薄薄的专业书。此外还有：
Seinfeld (season 7) disc 1 & 2,
Planet Earth disc 4,
追星Vitas，并不量力的跟着他引吭高歌“喔~~啊~~~~“ 达5，6遍之久。这是个致命的错误。是个至今还在致着命的错误。要想知道这个错误有多致命涅，不用看下文，你先click 听一听，并跟着“喔啊”一下就清楚了，这就是传说中的海豚音啊，同学们。
第三周：俺是如何革命的？
星期一：一下打死7个（非小裁缝版）
一觉睡到6：00，洗漱时，从喉咙深处突然发出“阿~呀”奇怪的声音，先把自己吓了一跳，再来一嗓子，依旧是个吃了黄连的可怜哑巴，哑了，85%的哑了，本来就感冒咳嗽有些日子了，这霜加的可真正是时候呀！去还是不去，现在已经不再是个问题了，6：40，悄悄的，俺走了，抱着一瓶矿泉水。
从8：00am 到 5：15pm，抱着那瓶水，俺先后进出了7间屋子，见了7个人，握了7只手，坐了7把椅子，谈了7个小时的话，在 N>7 块白板上涂了鸦。
俺那撕心裂肺的15%，看来并没有换来一丝的同情。
那么，俺是如何让这个15% 劳作7小时的呢？想象一下两个地下共产党是如何秘密接头的吧。
中间有一次30分钟的 break，拿出从 receptionist 那儿得的一本 sudoku，翻到最后一页埋头做了起来（人家小米已经说了，做sudoku的正确姿势就是得*埋头*），没能完成，人倒是出落得愈发的晃悠了，同学们若是瞅见了，还不得好奇：你酱紫是要去忽悠另一个dorky nerd 吗？
当俺晃悠出第7间屋子，夕阳还没有西下，也没能迎来彩虹彩霞，头已经铺天盖地的痛起来了，没有人性啊，如此的革命。
星期二：革命要彻底
一天没能折腾完，星期二还得一大早去见大大老板。大大老板自然有他大的道理，与君一席话，如沐春风，胜读一宿书。但是油条的我，心里亮堂堂着呢，这叫professional smile，暗含杀机。尽管心里亮堂，但还是对他留下了不错的印象，知道了 professional 的厉害了吧。
10：15 俺回去接着坐班发财。
星期三：大团圆
发生在星期三早上的塞车，是史无前例的莫名其妙的一大清早的全城皆兵的塞车。于是熄了引擎，坐在静止的车中，我隔岸观火，打开收音机，好心情地，我关注着来自世界各地的每一阵风起每一片云涌，并自虐的幻想着这车若是塞在一天两天前，那俺的帖子就可以出上下集了。
从黎明前的最黑暗一直到余波跌宕的秋后，端的是完整的谱写了一曲我们走在革命的偏锋大道上，意气风发，斗志昂扬。
尾巴：
革命群众已经表态了：过程很重要，Q兄也有教诲：贵在同去，所以革命有无成功，是不重要的不打紧的。但俺这片 post 可是来之不易的，有诗为凭：
敲字夜当午，水灌园中土。
谁知帖中言，笔笔皆辛苦。
前任老板来email说他那有空缺了，问我有意否，当即答曰有，并作热情洋溢状。其实这to do or not to do, 对俺总是一个极大的人生考验。
是夜，端坐床头开始了又一轮的人生怀疑——
Daddy 的“有时，赚钱还是很重要”的语重心长没能打动我——这不是还在赚着嘛；
耳边回荡着对函函的耳提面命：“越努力，你得到的自由就越多”也没能激发我——谁说的马列主义口朝外是小朋友的专长呢？
一个半小时过后，俺的思路终于给扶上了正轨，俺终于给自己找到了一丝动力：你想啊，我若是去折腾折腾，回来就有的可写了。
于是释然，拍拍身旁这位贤弟的肩膀，毅然决然道：愚兄决定会~他一会。
于是贤弟很贤惠地把俺 gmail+blogger的帐号封杀了。接下来是大家将要看到的，所谓：网上的风平浪静，网下的风雨欲来。
第一周：一个无产者的光辉形象
很没脑子的，俺把 screen 安排在周五下午3：30，明知自己患有严重的周五下午综合症，当时为何如此犯浑，现在已无从考据。当我形象悲惨的现身面试官跟前，一脸的沧桑一脑的糊浆，外带嘴角的水泡闪亮登场，接下来的故事就不用一一向人民汇报了吧，只记得当考官谆谆诱之导之，我终于醍醐灌顶，大家终于松一口气，我说：why didn't you just say so? 很nice 的人儿便很有些歉然了。
第二周：革命生产两不误
每天晚上很本分的挤出一个小时来看书，周末更是全天的用功。就是这样俺囫囵完了一本薄薄的专业书。此外还有：
Seinfeld (season 7) disc 1 & 2,
Planet Earth disc 4,
追星Vitas，并不量力的跟着他引吭高歌“喔~~啊~~~~“ 达5，6遍之久。这是个致命的错误。是个至今还在致着命的错误。要想知道这个错误有多致命涅，不用看下文，你先click 听一听，并跟着“喔啊”一下就清楚了，这就是传说中的海豚音啊，同学们。
第三周：俺是如何革命的？
星期一：一下打死7个（非小裁缝版）
一觉睡到6：00，洗漱时，从喉咙深处突然发出“阿~呀”奇怪的声音，先把自己吓了一跳，再来一嗓子，依旧是个吃了黄连的可怜哑巴，哑了，85%的哑了，本来就感冒咳嗽有些日子了，这霜加的可真正是时候呀！去还是不去，现在已经不再是个问题了，6：40，悄悄的，俺走了，抱着一瓶矿泉水。
从8：00am 到 5：15pm，抱着那瓶水，俺先后进出了7间屋子，见了7个人，握了7只手，坐了7把椅子，谈了7个小时的话，在 N>7 块白板上涂了鸦。
俺那撕心裂肺的15%，看来并没有换来一丝的同情。
那么，俺是如何让这个15% 劳作7小时的呢？想象一下两个地下共产党是如何秘密接头的吧。
中间有一次30分钟的 break，拿出从 receptionist 那儿得的一本 sudoku，翻到最后一页埋头做了起来（人家小米已经说了，做sudoku的正确姿势就是得*埋头*），没能完成，人倒是出落得愈发的晃悠了，同学们若是瞅见了，还不得好奇：你酱紫是要去忽悠另一个dorky nerd 吗？
当俺晃悠出第7间屋子，夕阳还没有西下，也没能迎来彩虹彩霞，头已经铺天盖地的痛起来了，没有人性啊，如此的革命。
星期二：革命要彻底
一天没能折腾完，星期二还得一大早去见大大老板。大大老板自然有他大的道理，与君一席话，如沐春风，胜读一宿书。但是油条的我，心里亮堂堂着呢，这叫professional smile，暗含杀机。尽管心里亮堂，但还是对他留下了不错的印象，知道了 professional 的厉害了吧。
10：15 俺回去接着坐班发财。
星期三：大团圆
发生在星期三早上的塞车，是史无前例的莫名其妙的一大清早的全城皆兵的塞车。于是熄了引擎，坐在静止的车中，我隔岸观火，打开收音机，好心情地，我关注着来自世界各地的每一阵风起每一片云涌，并自虐的幻想着这车若是塞在一天两天前，那俺的帖子就可以出上下集了。
从黎明前的最黑暗一直到余波跌宕的秋后，端的是完整的谱写了一曲我们走在革命的偏锋大道上，意气风发，斗志昂扬。
尾巴：
革命群众已经表态了：过程很重要，Q兄也有教诲：贵在同去，所以革命有无成功，是不重要的不打紧的。但俺这片 post 可是来之不易的，有诗为凭：
敲字夜当午，水灌园中土。
谁知帖中言，笔笔皆辛苦。
Monday, June 25, 2007
The Last Day of School
Today was the last day of second grade. Somehow, I started feeling very sad and I felt like crying (I did when I got home). I will miss all the fun memories that only second graders could have. I would miss my friends that were going away next year. I would miss my teacher Mrs. Best. She could be very stern at times and even yell at us but she is still a great teacher.
"Aren't you excited that you are growing up?" my mom asked me at home. "No." I said and started to cry. "Why? Why don't you want to live on your own and have a great life?" "Because I want to stay at home and live with dad, Melody, Lila, and you. I don't want to go away from my family and live alone." "You can phone me from time to time," she suggested. "I'll always be there." "Not always." Saying this gave me a sick feeling. It meant when my mom died.
"I also want to stay young and have fun. If I grow up, I'll be separated from my friends." 'I thought you didn't like Riddhi." said mom. "Yes, but I have other friends." I answered.
The yearbook I ordered for this year made me even more upset and my heart sank beneath my toes, which made me cry harder. I will never see Hannah M., Youjin, and some other kids next year. Hari, the only boy in my class who made friends with me, besides Anish, left for India a couple weeks ago. The smile he had on his face in the yearbook made me feel weak and sad, and at the same time, as if it were a wonderful day. I felt melancholy and joy at the same time every time I looked at his photograph.
It was the same way with everyone else's photo, but not as strong. When Addie was only 8, when the rest of us (including me) were only 7, and when Anish was only 6. I had been very proud of Mrs. Best. So many people wanted her that they envied my class, and me. She was so friendly and full of smiles back then.
Now, I said good-bye to her with a high-five for a great year, and a hug that I didn't want to let go of.
As I went out the door to my classroom, I walked as slow as possible and closed my eyes to remember the loud and seemingly familiar noises of my school, so I can play it in my head whenever I want to like music. Then I looked all around to catch all the memories I could with my eyes.
When I finally reached the door, I hugged the wall one last time to feel it's pleasant roughness. I blew the whole school a kiss. Then I said to Anish, "Once I step outside, I may never go in again."
I stuck out one foot. "Good bye Discovery." I whispered and gave it one last loving look. Then I slowly put out the other one on the sidewalk. Suddenly, I stepped back in again. I couldn't leave. I just couldn't. When everyone was out, screaming with joy, I went out of the building.
Here's the explanation for this behavior: I might be going to Endeavour next year and I tried to get the last of the school I had been in ever since kindergarten. Discovery was the school I had been to the longest, and I was saying my good-byes. I only hope for success, happiness, and friends if I go to Endeavour.
-by Hannah
"Aren't you excited that you are growing up?" my mom asked me at home. "No." I said and started to cry. "Why? Why don't you want to live on your own and have a great life?" "Because I want to stay at home and live with dad, Melody, Lila, and you. I don't want to go away from my family and live alone." "You can phone me from time to time," she suggested. "I'll always be there." "Not always." Saying this gave me a sick feeling. It meant when my mom died.
"I also want to stay young and have fun. If I grow up, I'll be separated from my friends." 'I thought you didn't like Riddhi." said mom. "Yes, but I have other friends." I answered.
The yearbook I ordered for this year made me even more upset and my heart sank beneath my toes, which made me cry harder. I will never see Hannah M., Youjin, and some other kids next year. Hari, the only boy in my class who made friends with me, besides Anish, left for India a couple weeks ago. The smile he had on his face in the yearbook made me feel weak and sad, and at the same time, as if it were a wonderful day. I felt melancholy and joy at the same time every time I looked at his photograph.
It was the same way with everyone else's photo, but not as strong. When Addie was only 8, when the rest of us (including me) were only 7, and when Anish was only 6. I had been very proud of Mrs. Best. So many people wanted her that they envied my class, and me. She was so friendly and full of smiles back then.
Now, I said good-bye to her with a high-five for a great year, and a hug that I didn't want to let go of.
As I went out the door to my classroom, I walked as slow as possible and closed my eyes to remember the loud and seemingly familiar noises of my school, so I can play it in my head whenever I want to like music. Then I looked all around to catch all the memories I could with my eyes.
When I finally reached the door, I hugged the wall one last time to feel it's pleasant roughness. I blew the whole school a kiss. Then I said to Anish, "Once I step outside, I may never go in again."
I stuck out one foot. "Good bye Discovery." I whispered and gave it one last loving look. Then I slowly put out the other one on the sidewalk. Suddenly, I stepped back in again. I couldn't leave. I just couldn't. When everyone was out, screaming with joy, I went out of the building.
Here's the explanation for this behavior: I might be going to Endeavour next year and I tried to get the last of the school I had been in ever since kindergarten. Discovery was the school I had been to the longest, and I was saying my good-byes. I only hope for success, happiness, and friends if I go to Endeavour.
-by Hannah
Saturday, June 23, 2007
#5
周末的晚饭9：30才开始，俺家的老大，也就是那个最小的，已经在沙发上呼噜2，3个时辰了，估计是要一呼呼到天明了。这边三个人在厨房里说话做事，那边匀称的呼着，不由得对小朋友肃然起敬了，啧啧，瞧睡的那个扎实。
吃完了饭，我说：函函，自己上去刷牙洗脸睡觉吧。
可不可以有人一起去啊？
爸妈得把这里的活干完，你把所有的灯都打开，就不怕了。
没有动静，爸爸发话了：你叫 Lila 陪你去吧。
函函拉开后门，冲院子里喊：Lila, Lila.
Lila —— 咱家各个活物都是这么特立独行，有个性——不知又去哪里神游了。
那我就在沙发上睡吧。
这样你睡不好的，总是要上去的，去吧。
函函不作声，走了，走到厅里的沙发上躺下了。后来看了她的bully的帖，一对照，才知道俺被小蹄子#5了。
但当时我还觉得好笑，就笑着对蹄子她爸说：看见没，不搭理你，该怎么着还是怎么着。
就是你笑，把她惯坏的。
——看见没，如果还有那位叔叔阿姨固执的认为俺家养着一个乖乖女，并且如果不幸你家还养着个门当户对的小年轻儿，小心哦，别到时怪俺没提醒。
吃完了饭，我说：函函，自己上去刷牙洗脸睡觉吧。
可不可以有人一起去啊？
爸妈得把这里的活干完，你把所有的灯都打开，就不怕了。
没有动静，爸爸发话了：你叫 Lila 陪你去吧。
函函拉开后门，冲院子里喊：Lila, Lila.
Lila —— 咱家各个活物都是这么特立独行，有个性——不知又去哪里神游了。
那我就在沙发上睡吧。
这样你睡不好的，总是要上去的，去吧。
函函不作声，走了，走到厅里的沙发上躺下了。后来看了她的bully的帖，一对照，才知道俺被小蹄子#5了。
但当时我还觉得好笑，就笑着对蹄子她爸说：看见没，不搭理你，该怎么着还是怎么着。
就是你笑，把她惯坏的。
——看见没，如果还有那位叔叔阿姨固执的认为俺家养着一个乖乖女，并且如果不幸你家还养着个门当户对的小年轻儿，小心哦，别到时怪俺没提醒。
Friday, June 22, 2007
How to Deal with a Bully
If a bully is being mean to you or someone else...
1. Just simply talk with them. Sometimes, without using bad words, they'll just stop what's bothering you.
2. Consider an adult. They are always a choice for problems.
3. Act firm and bold. If you are shy, they just might do more bad things to you.
4. Walk away from them if they tease you, or say 'STOP!' You will soon forget about it.
5. Ignore them.
6. Be kind to them. Like the saying 'Treat others the way you want to be treated', they'll probally be nice to you too.
DO NOT do the following to a bully who's bothering you. It might make things worse.
7. Fight or be unkind with them.
8. Never say a thing about it, which leaves you regretting and feeling sad inside your heart.
9. Make THEM mad, sad, or hurt.
10. Take the teasing and taunting as true things.
--By Hannah
1. Just simply talk with them. Sometimes, without using bad words, they'll just stop what's bothering you.
2. Consider an adult. They are always a choice for problems.
3. Act firm and bold. If you are shy, they just might do more bad things to you.
4. Walk away from them if they tease you, or say 'STOP!' You will soon forget about it.
5. Ignore them.
6. Be kind to them. Like the saying 'Treat others the way you want to be treated', they'll probally be nice to you too.
DO NOT do the following to a bully who's bothering you. It might make things worse.
7. Fight or be unkind with them.
8. Never say a thing about it, which leaves you regretting and feeling sad inside your heart.
9. Make THEM mad, sad, or hurt.
10. Take the teasing and taunting as true things.
--By Hannah
Thursday, June 21, 2007
Melody the Great Editor
I was singing "I'm a Little Teapot" with 妹妹. Then purposely, I made a mistake, just to test her. She noticed. "No, it's not like that," said 妹妹, "It goes like this. 'I'm a little teapot, short and stout!' Not 'I'm a little teapot, short and short!'" She laughed, "Not 'short and short!'"
I sang it again, this time the right way. And something strange happened. 妹妹 said, "Way to go!"
-- By Hannah
I sang it again, this time the right way. And something strange happened. 妹妹 said, "Way to go!"
-- By Hannah
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
This Morning......
At 6:30 AM, I was awakened by a sound of pattering feet. At first, all sounds didn't sound very clear, so I thought it was Lila. But it was heavier, and it was not as fast. Then, I heard a bit of giggling. It was Melody. I couldn't believe it.
A three-year-old who wakes up earlier than her big sister and sleeps later! She ran past. Then, the noise stopped. A moment later, it was on again. But it seemed to be coming towards me than going away. The door swung open. Light flooded in and blinded my eyes. Melody came in. "What is she doing in my room at such an early hour?!" I thought. She came closer, until she was on my bed. Then I got a horror right before my eyes. Melody was about to sit on me!!! She pulled off a bit of her pajama pants. Suddenly, she froze. In a split second, Melody had jumped up, pulled up her pants, and dashed through the door.
The light pittar-patter-pitter-patter returned, but went faster and it was starting to fade. Another door slammed. The toilet flushed, the sink turned on, and the door opened again. Melody sped through the hall to her own room. There was a flurry of blankets, and all was quiet again. I went back to sleep.
From now on, I hope she can tell the difference between my room and the bathroom, and between me and the toilet.
-- By Hannah
A three-year-old who wakes up earlier than her big sister and sleeps later! She ran past. Then, the noise stopped. A moment later, it was on again. But it seemed to be coming towards me than going away. The door swung open. Light flooded in and blinded my eyes. Melody came in. "What is she doing in my room at such an early hour?!" I thought. She came closer, until she was on my bed. Then I got a horror right before my eyes. Melody was about to sit on me!!! She pulled off a bit of her pajama pants. Suddenly, she froze. In a split second, Melody had jumped up, pulled up her pants, and dashed through the door.
The light pittar-patter-pitter-patter returned, but went faster and it was starting to fade. Another door slammed. The toilet flushed, the sink turned on, and the door opened again. Melody sped through the hall to her own room. There was a flurry of blankets, and all was quiet again. I went back to sleep.
From now on, I hope she can tell the difference between my room and the bathroom, and between me and the toilet.
-- By Hannah
棉袄有就得穿，虽然夏天了
晚饭后，歪在沙发上。
函函过来问：我可以弹琴吗？
当然，给我弹首好听的曲子吧，或许我的肚子就不会那么痛了。
小姑娘冲我笑了笑，弹起了" Long long ago", 她的第一首favorite song，和 "Starlight Waltz".
妹妹从后院奔将过来，一边尖声尖气的问道：What's the matter, Mommy?
妈妈肚子有点痛。
Do you want drink water?
好的。
小能干婆似的，小姑娘倒来一杯凉水，并转了转杯子，把杯子的柄塞到我手里，喝了一口，我说：嗯，now I feel much better, 你也喝一口吧。
妹妹夸张地喝完了杯子里的水，摸摸肚子：嗯，much better. 然后又小能干婆似的，把杯子放回去，自己到 office 画画去了。
函函过来问：我可以弹琴吗？
当然，给我弹首好听的曲子吧，或许我的肚子就不会那么痛了。
小姑娘冲我笑了笑，弹起了" Long long ago", 她的第一首favorite song，和 "Starlight Waltz".
妹妹从后院奔将过来，一边尖声尖气的问道：What's the matter, Mommy?
妈妈肚子有点痛。
Do you want drink water?
好的。
小能干婆似的，小姑娘倒来一杯凉水，并转了转杯子，把杯子的柄塞到我手里，喝了一口，我说：嗯，now I feel much better, 你也喝一口吧。
妹妹夸张地喝完了杯子里的水，摸摸肚子：嗯，much better. 然后又小能干婆似的，把杯子放回去，自己到 office 画画去了。
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Melody the Great Compromiser
一日Daddy开车送妹妹上学， 忽然妹妹发现了什么：“Look, a red motorcycle!"
Daddy: "hmmm, 好像是black motorcycle, honey"
"... How about red and black motorcycle? Say yes!"
今天放学回家，妹妹又有发现："Look, a motorcycle! two girls ride a motorcycle!"
Daddy: "hmmm, 好像是two boys, honey"
"... How about one boy and one girl? This is great!"
Daddy: "hmmm, 好像是black motorcycle, honey"
"... How about red and black motorcycle? Say yes!"
今天放学回家，妹妹又有发现："Look, a motorcycle! two girls ride a motorcycle!"
Daddy: "hmmm, 好像是two boys, honey"
"... How about one boy and one girl? This is great!"
Sunday, June 10, 2007
似水年华 II —— birthday party
妹妹刚上学那会儿，一天我去接她，发现她嘴边有巧克力蛋糕的渣渣，便问：妹妹，今天有 birthday party 啦？ 妹妹说yeah, 我又问：是谁的 birthday party 呀？妹妹略带羞涩的说：妹妹的，我说：哦，妹妹的 party 呀，妹妹略带腼腆地幸福地笑了。我想这倒不错，别人家的妈妈买蛋糕张罗，我们家的妹妹过party.
后来，妹妹又过了两三次这样的 birthday party.
直到有一天，去邻居家小妹妹的 birthday party, 小朋友都带上了silly hat，切蛋糕时，妹妹坐在桌前两眼专注的看着蛋糕切成一块块，回过头小声问我：妈妈，it's Melody's birthday? 眼中露出不是很 sure 的眼神，但是还是很期盼，我小声地在她耳边回道：是呀，是妹妹的。妹妹笑了，但以前十足的憨气只剩七八成了。
后来又一次参加这样的 party，切蛋糕时，妹妹自顾自的说：不是妹妹的 birthday party. 妈妈一旁听了，只觉得回天乏力无可奈何花落去。
后来，妹妹又过了两三次这样的 birthday party.
直到有一天，去邻居家小妹妹的 birthday party, 小朋友都带上了silly hat，切蛋糕时，妹妹坐在桌前两眼专注的看着蛋糕切成一块块，回过头小声问我：妈妈，it's Melody's birthday? 眼中露出不是很 sure 的眼神，但是还是很期盼，我小声地在她耳边回道：是呀，是妹妹的。妹妹笑了，但以前十足的憨气只剩七八成了。
后来又一次参加这样的 party，切蛋糕时，妹妹自顾自的说：不是妹妹的 birthday party. 妈妈一旁听了，只觉得回天乏力无可奈何花落去。
童年回忆 ——正午
我的童年是在封闭的小村庄里度过的。没有报纸书刊，收音机电视机，当然也没见过手机电脑。周围都是朴实的祖辈为农的农民，等我后来进城读了点书再回来时，比我长几岁的姑娘拿着一袋洗衣粉指给我看说：这是高级洗衣粉，光军牌的。令现在的我惊讶的是，当时我虽知书不多，却很达礼的没有跟她指出，这是“光辉”牌。
夏天的晌午，人们都睡午觉去了，我坐在大门口高高的门栏上，看着屋外白花花的静止的世界，没有狗叫声，呱噪的知了也歇息了，没有苍蝇嗡嗡翁的飞来飞去，一丝风也没有，树啊草啊，都愣在那儿，一动也不动。如果你说有着蛙鸣狗吠的农村的夜晚是安静的，在一天最为亮堂的正午却是比夜晚更无声无息。
在我混沌的幼小的心灵里，也感受到了“寂寞”的淡淡的滋味，感受到了时间的“恒河沙量”，感受到了空洞，一如眼前白花花的静止的世界。
那个坐在门栏上的四五岁的小女孩，跟趴在树荫下打盹的黄狗，又有什么区别呢？自生自灭，浑然天成，也未必就不是一种幸福，虽然是小姑娘和那只狗自己都没意识到的幸福。
夏天的晌午，人们都睡午觉去了，我坐在大门口高高的门栏上，看着屋外白花花的静止的世界，没有狗叫声，呱噪的知了也歇息了，没有苍蝇嗡嗡翁的飞来飞去，一丝风也没有，树啊草啊，都愣在那儿，一动也不动。如果你说有着蛙鸣狗吠的农村的夜晚是安静的，在一天最为亮堂的正午却是比夜晚更无声无息。
在我混沌的幼小的心灵里，也感受到了“寂寞”的淡淡的滋味，感受到了时间的“恒河沙量”，感受到了空洞，一如眼前白花花的静止的世界。
那个坐在门栏上的四五岁的小女孩，跟趴在树荫下打盹的黄狗，又有什么区别呢？自生自灭，浑然天成，也未必就不是一种幸福，虽然是小姑娘和那只狗自己都没意识到的幸福。
Saturday, June 9, 2007
花椰菜与玫瑰
昨天，周五，下班回家路上就一气把下周的菜菜也买了，这样做得好处是，今天，周六，大家呆在家里很relax, 尤其是在这么个阴雨天，不过俺还是得出门半小时去跟 girl scout council manager 交待这一年的工作，俺是不能再当这个 troop leader, 一没 leadership, 二时间上安排不过来。出门前跟姐姐妹妹say byebye.
“妹妹，妈妈要出门了，一会就回来，你要不要去啊？”
“No." 妹妹忙着涂一只 pink 的恐龙；
“那，要妈妈给你买些什么吗？”
“菜菜”——穷人家的孩子早当家啊；
“菜菜妈妈昨天已经买了，妹妹你还要点什么吗？”
"Broccoli"
——来，让我们找找差距：
"And what shall I bring you, Beauty?" for Beauty had yet asked for nothing.
"Why, since you ask me, dear father," said she,"I should like you to bring me a rose, for none grow in these parts."
（Beauty and the Beast， Horace Scudder version)
“妹妹，妈妈要出门了，一会就回来，你要不要去啊？”
“No." 妹妹忙着涂一只 pink 的恐龙；
“那，要妈妈给你买些什么吗？”
“菜菜”——穷人家的孩子早当家啊；
“菜菜妈妈昨天已经买了，妹妹你还要点什么吗？”
"Broccoli"
——来，让我们找找差距：
"And what shall I bring you, Beauty?" for Beauty had yet asked for nothing.
"Why, since you ask me, dear father," said she,"I should like you to bring me a rose, for none grow in these parts."
（Beauty and the Beast， Horace Scudder version)
Chatterbox
At dinner time I always talk up a storm with my family. It's the same while going home from Kids Play, I talk about school. The same at recess. I talk to Riddhi and Kendall and while at Kids Play, Skylar, Paisley, Jenna, Cassidy, Julia, Lauren W. and B., Mark, Steven, Chase, Drake, Ankit and Archit (twins), Sudarsan, Kristina, Anish, Chris W. and N., Alyson, Avery, Zachery, Ketaki, and anyone there, even Zea, who never pays attention to anyone or anything but Anish's Game boy and Cassidy's DS. Chris N. is the same, telling a teacher if someone won't let him play their Game boy or DS.
Anyway, I just talk, talk, talk, and talk with anyone I can find, except for strangers. Few people pay close attention though, probably because I stumble over words and say long, dull, speeches. In fact, talking isn't bad but too much might drive away people's attention or association from you, especially when you start using bad words in coversations. That's why I am trying to work out my problem and be at least a moderate chatterbox. But if you never say a word at all to people but your family, like Kristina, that isn't good either, because you can't tell others what you think.
-- by Hannah
Anyway, I just talk, talk, talk, and talk with anyone I can find, except for strangers. Few people pay close attention though, probably because I stumble over words and say long, dull, speeches. In fact, talking isn't bad but too much might drive away people's attention or association from you, especially when you start using bad words in coversations. That's why I am trying to work out my problem and be at least a moderate chatterbox. But if you never say a word at all to people but your family, like Kristina, that isn't good either, because you can't tell others what you think.
-- by Hannah
Thursday, June 7, 2007
再论尘世和神仙——试答迷糊昨半夜对婚姻的长考
宇宙之大，有无神仙，无可考据，但并不打紧，神人倒是有的。
最近几个晚上Daddy 很敬业的追星 Fleetwood Mac，我一旁勤奋的写博，时不时也跟风追一下，这是由两对情侣组成的乐队，其中的女主唱手最后还是和吉他手（？）broke up了，现在她已经60多岁了，依然闪耀着明星的光芒，你不得不说人家不仅仅是个摇滚歌星，更是一个艺术家，采访中，她谈到无法忍受婚姻带来的束缚，所以有过几段开花没结果的感情，她要的是很彻底的自由。她的创作颇丰，一度乐队都没法演出她的所有歌曲，她真的是很enjoy她的创作和演出。
看着她，我总有一丝丝替她遗憾，仔细想想，就因为她没像咱们一样settle down? 人家其实过得很丰富，很满足，一点也不寂寞孤单，我是完全的杞人忧天，他们没有束缚，没有义务，自由自在的发挥自己。这是一种生活，一种我只能一旁观望的生活。年轻时也曾观想过这种生活，想着有一辆房车（要什么房子啊，买什么养老金啊），爱上哪儿就上哪。
其实我是羡慕他们的。毕竟他们实现了他们的梦想。而我随了大流。
尘世的忙碌当然也给了我们丰厚的回报，稳定的生活，熟悉的环境，you name it.
但是，久而久之，活在大多数人一致认同的生活模式里，忙着大多数人一致认同的琐事，念叨着大多数人一致认同的价值观……太久了，内心有了些蠢蠢欲动，此事无关乎风与月，就是，想多要一点自由，一点新鲜空气。
于是大家嚷嚷着要度假，要去荒郊野外，确实，两三天的逃逸，似乎也释放了不少长期中规中矩的生活所积累下来的沉闷和压抑。
但这毕竟是被动的，是一年一次两次的事，还是不够的，于是各式各式的危机就产生了：中年危机，婚姻危机，信仰危机，能源危机……
那么，身为油条夹愤青的俺，享受着尘世的生活的好处，自然也放不下隔壁的青青绿草。于是也开始了今天一整个白天的长考，结果是，就像馒头师傅的三言两语解说做馒头的要领，俺这儿也就两言两语：
心中总放不下的对自由的向往，其实一直就握在我们自己手里。给对方充分的空间，也留给你自己充分的空间。
举例：
1。T米虽外表柔弱，却从来晚上一人勇敢的打的回家，也没觉得委屈啥的；
2。星妈星爸虽相敬如宾，也有划拳解决矛盾的时候；
3。Charlotte 从没嫌弃过丈夫的懦弱，注意啦：我提到那位堂兄时，用的是可怜的人，不是小人，虽说俺愤青。有时，慈悲与宽容比明辨是非更重要。
4。那位相信settling的同胞，虽与丈夫南北两极，同床异梦（我猜的），却也幸福美满，各得其所；
5。镜子：Daddy, 你去做那什么什么吧；
Daddy: 我觉得不是非做不可；
结果：镜子或者认命的自己去做了（镜子家家规：你觉得非做不可的而别人不觉得非做不可的，那你自己去做了好乐），或者转念一想，也不是非得现在做哈，那就接着躺着玩儿罢。
一个反例：
聚会时，有一家人，因着小孩淘气，互相指责埋怨，因着丈夫一句不得体的话，一个不得体的举动（其实都是她觉得的不得体哈,俺瞅着还觉得满可爱的）而露出不nice的神色。旁边观望的人，脑子里就会不由得遣词造句起来：枷锁，坟墓，桎梏……
家庭婚姻，其实可以给你带来更多的自由和空间，因为有了亲人的关爱和包容。This I believe.
--顺手拈花，仅以此文献给俺家的Daddy，和很多的星爸爸鹿爸爸阳光小美女的爸爸们：父亲节快乐。
(后记：论着论着，又跑题了，同学们，这命题论文不好做啊。俺发现这是个不可论的论题，因为神人一般不结婚，所以没有神仙婚姻一说，只有自由的婚姻和束缚的婚姻，这里论的是这个。）
最近几个晚上Daddy 很敬业的追星 Fleetwood Mac，我一旁勤奋的写博，时不时也跟风追一下，这是由两对情侣组成的乐队，其中的女主唱手最后还是和吉他手（？）broke up了，现在她已经60多岁了，依然闪耀着明星的光芒，你不得不说人家不仅仅是个摇滚歌星，更是一个艺术家，采访中，她谈到无法忍受婚姻带来的束缚，所以有过几段开花没结果的感情，她要的是很彻底的自由。她的创作颇丰，一度乐队都没法演出她的所有歌曲，她真的是很enjoy她的创作和演出。
看着她，我总有一丝丝替她遗憾，仔细想想，就因为她没像咱们一样settle down? 人家其实过得很丰富，很满足，一点也不寂寞孤单，我是完全的杞人忧天，他们没有束缚，没有义务，自由自在的发挥自己。这是一种生活，一种我只能一旁观望的生活。年轻时也曾观想过这种生活，想着有一辆房车（要什么房子啊，买什么养老金啊），爱上哪儿就上哪。
其实我是羡慕他们的。毕竟他们实现了他们的梦想。而我随了大流。
尘世的忙碌当然也给了我们丰厚的回报，稳定的生活，熟悉的环境，you name it.
但是，久而久之，活在大多数人一致认同的生活模式里，忙着大多数人一致认同的琐事，念叨着大多数人一致认同的价值观……太久了，内心有了些蠢蠢欲动，此事无关乎风与月，就是，想多要一点自由，一点新鲜空气。
于是大家嚷嚷着要度假，要去荒郊野外，确实，两三天的逃逸，似乎也释放了不少长期中规中矩的生活所积累下来的沉闷和压抑。
但这毕竟是被动的，是一年一次两次的事，还是不够的，于是各式各式的危机就产生了：中年危机，婚姻危机，信仰危机，能源危机……
那么，身为油条夹愤青的俺，享受着尘世的生活的好处，自然也放不下隔壁的青青绿草。于是也开始了今天一整个白天的长考，结果是，就像馒头师傅的三言两语解说做馒头的要领，俺这儿也就两言两语：
心中总放不下的对自由的向往，其实一直就握在我们自己手里。给对方充分的空间，也留给你自己充分的空间。
举例：
1。T米虽外表柔弱，却从来晚上一人勇敢的打的回家，也没觉得委屈啥的；
2。星妈星爸虽相敬如宾，也有划拳解决矛盾的时候；
3。Charlotte 从没嫌弃过丈夫的懦弱，注意啦：我提到那位堂兄时，用的是可怜的人，不是小人，虽说俺愤青。有时，慈悲与宽容比明辨是非更重要。
4。那位相信settling的同胞，虽与丈夫南北两极，同床异梦（我猜的），却也幸福美满，各得其所；
5。镜子：Daddy, 你去做那什么什么吧；
Daddy: 我觉得不是非做不可；
结果：镜子或者认命的自己去做了（镜子家家规：你觉得非做不可的而别人不觉得非做不可的，那你自己去做了好乐），或者转念一想，也不是非得现在做哈，那就接着躺着玩儿罢。
一个反例：
聚会时，有一家人，因着小孩淘气，互相指责埋怨，因着丈夫一句不得体的话，一个不得体的举动（其实都是她觉得的不得体哈,俺瞅着还觉得满可爱的）而露出不nice的神色。旁边观望的人，脑子里就会不由得遣词造句起来：枷锁，坟墓，桎梏……
家庭婚姻，其实可以给你带来更多的自由和空间，因为有了亲人的关爱和包容。This I believe.
--顺手拈花，仅以此文献给俺家的Daddy，和很多的星爸爸鹿爸爸阳光小美女的爸爸们：父亲节快乐。
(后记：论着论着，又跑题了，同学们，这命题论文不好做啊。俺发现这是个不可论的论题，因为神人一般不结婚，所以没有神仙婚姻一说，只有自由的婚姻和束缚的婚姻，这里论的是这个。）
Tuesday, June 5, 2007
汗。。。
俺家Daddy 爱生口腔溃疡，一次就要痛上好几个星期。今天终于挤出时间为这影响生活质量的小病大痛看了医生，医生说这种溃疡多半因为stress, lack of sleep 所致，并且要尽量少喝 citrus drink 以免延缓溃疡愈合。
汗。。。的是，Daddy 遵嘱俺这位曾经郎中的指示，每日一杯 orange juice 很勤奋的喝着，直到今日正午时分。原以为喝点果汁，增加点维生素abcd，1234，虽不是灵丹，至少也可混个万京油什么的。
不专业就是不专业啊，敬请以后大家咳嗽感冒的宁愿自己扛着，也不要向俺咨询了，大伙也都知道，只要有一点点水沫，俺就会给人来指手画脚。俺已经给自个儿取消了这方面的话语权勒。（这个词俺会用可不知是啥意思？T 蜜家的八哥整天嘎嘎的，又是谁给了伊话语权的涅？这是个值得深思的问题。）
汗。。。的是，Daddy 遵嘱俺这位曾经郎中的指示，每日一杯 orange juice 很勤奋的喝着，直到今日正午时分。原以为喝点果汁，增加点维生素abcd，1234，虽不是灵丹，至少也可混个万京油什么的。
不专业就是不专业啊，敬请以后大家咳嗽感冒的宁愿自己扛着，也不要向俺咨询了，大伙也都知道，只要有一点点水沫，俺就会给人来指手画脚。俺已经给自个儿取消了这方面的话语权勒。（这个词俺会用可不知是啥意思？T 蜜家的八哥整天嘎嘎的，又是谁给了伊话语权的涅？这是个值得深思的问题。）
Monday, June 4, 2007
尘世间的婚姻
先好好学习学习下面一篇 essay:
“My husband is not my best friend. He doesn't complete me. In fact, he can be a self-absorbed jerk. We're nearly polar opposites: He's a lifetime member of the NRA who doesn't care for journalists, and I'm a lifelong liberal with a journalism degree. On the other hand, he doesn't beat or emotionally abuse me. He doesn't drink or chase other women. He's a good provider. So I'm sticking with him.
Some people would call that "settling," like it's a bad thing. But I believe in settling.
The Random House Unabridged Dictionary defines "to settle" as "to place in a desired state or order; to quiet, calm or bring to rest; to make stable." In short, it means that a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.
Alas, too many of us buy into a different adage: that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence. From movies to magazines to commercials, we're told we should demand more from lives that are, for many of us, pretty good. We're supposed to look better, eat better, find better jobs, be better lovers and parents and workers. A stable marriage isn't enough; it's supposed to be a fairy tale. Perfection is the goal.
But at what cost? Would I really be any happier if I took up yoga and ate more soy? If my spouse wasn't just my partner, but also was my soul mate? I doubt it.
Settling, in my sense, is about acceptance. I'm a pretty happy person, in large part because I'm honest with myself about what I have. My body isn't bikini-worthy, but it's healthy. I'll never write for Rolling Stone as I once dreamed, but I am making a living as a writer. I yell at my sons and let them play too much GameCube, but I'm still a good mom.
Of course, some situations are worth improving. If your weight jeopardizes your health, exercise and change your eating habits. If your job makes you truly miserable, find a new one. If your marriage is toxic, end it. Chances are, though, you probably have what you need: a roof over your head, food on the table, a job that pays the bills, and family and friends. If you're unhappy, ask yourself: Am I unhappy because I really don't have what I need, or because I just want more?
So, yes, I'm settling. Sure, I wish my husband would kiss me more often, tell me he loves me every day, and get as excited about my accomplishments as I do. Emptying the dishwasher without being asked and giving me unsolicited foot massages wouldn't hurt, either.
All that would be nice, but it's not necessary. I'm happy with my husband who, despite his flaws, is a caring father, capable of acts of stunning generosity and fiercely protective of his family. Thinking about him may not set me on fire as it used to, but after 17 years and two kids, our love is still warm. And I believe that's good enough.”
这是我今天在回家途中收音机里听到的，后来在网上一查，原来 NPR 举办 this I believe 征文活动已有50多年的历史了。什么时候俺也去投一稿。——终极问题：人家咋就没整出一套“审美疲劳”来涅？
"Pride and Prejudice" ，Elizabeth 的堂兄来她家相亲遭到拒绝，Elizabeth 的闺蜜Charlotte 得知此事后，主动接近那位堂兄，没多久俩人便结为夫妇。那位堂兄是一位在权贵面前卑恭屈膝唯唯诺诺的可怜人，Charlotte 则称得上是一位有文化有见解的“知性女性”，Elizabeth 后来去见Charlotte，看见他们一家丰衣足食，相亲相爱，堂兄还是以前唯喏的样子，只是脸上多了些幸福，Charlotte 依就平淡从容令人尊敬和热爱。——这是在小说中看到的最令我叹为观止的婚姻。
当小风风需要 change diaper 时，妈妈秀气的说：你去吧，爸爸温柔的道：你去吧，妈妈甜蜜地：划拳吧，爸爸温和的：好，妈妈霎时两眼露出聪慧的光芒：一次定胜负，输了的去。剪刀锤子布，剪刀剪破布。爸爸认命地抱着风风上楼去了，妈妈挪挪身子，换了一种更惬意的姿势接着与本镜坐而论道。——这是 live happily ever after 的第N 年。
T闺蜜家有一项让俺跌破眼镜片的国策：半夜上下班，晚间的飞机，都是不接也不送。饭局时，俺就没见过T蜜给自己夹过菜菜，俺一旁不经意的拿眼瞧着，一边想啊：这在外面挡风遮雨的，不会是手无夹菜之力的这位吧？T蜜曾免费向我兜售她的治家理论：老头子总是对的，我问：那你收了多少袋烂苹果了呀？T蜜很不屑道：切，我这不是在等着金子嘛！
——这，就是尘世间的婚姻。没有 fairy 没有 tale.
“My husband is not my best friend. He doesn't complete me. In fact, he can be a self-absorbed jerk. We're nearly polar opposites: He's a lifetime member of the NRA who doesn't care for journalists, and I'm a lifelong liberal with a journalism degree. On the other hand, he doesn't beat or emotionally abuse me. He doesn't drink or chase other women. He's a good provider. So I'm sticking with him.
Some people would call that "settling," like it's a bad thing. But I believe in settling.
The Random House Unabridged Dictionary defines "to settle" as "to place in a desired state or order; to quiet, calm or bring to rest; to make stable." In short, it means that a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.
Alas, too many of us buy into a different adage: that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence. From movies to magazines to commercials, we're told we should demand more from lives that are, for many of us, pretty good. We're supposed to look better, eat better, find better jobs, be better lovers and parents and workers. A stable marriage isn't enough; it's supposed to be a fairy tale. Perfection is the goal.
But at what cost? Would I really be any happier if I took up yoga and ate more soy? If my spouse wasn't just my partner, but also was my soul mate? I doubt it.
Settling, in my sense, is about acceptance. I'm a pretty happy person, in large part because I'm honest with myself about what I have. My body isn't bikini-worthy, but it's healthy. I'll never write for Rolling Stone as I once dreamed, but I am making a living as a writer. I yell at my sons and let them play too much GameCube, but I'm still a good mom.
Of course, some situations are worth improving. If your weight jeopardizes your health, exercise and change your eating habits. If your job makes you truly miserable, find a new one. If your marriage is toxic, end it. Chances are, though, you probably have what you need: a roof over your head, food on the table, a job that pays the bills, and family and friends. If you're unhappy, ask yourself: Am I unhappy because I really don't have what I need, or because I just want more?
So, yes, I'm settling. Sure, I wish my husband would kiss me more often, tell me he loves me every day, and get as excited about my accomplishments as I do. Emptying the dishwasher without being asked and giving me unsolicited foot massages wouldn't hurt, either.
All that would be nice, but it's not necessary. I'm happy with my husband who, despite his flaws, is a caring father, capable of acts of stunning generosity and fiercely protective of his family. Thinking about him may not set me on fire as it used to, but after 17 years and two kids, our love is still warm. And I believe that's good enough.”
这是我今天在回家途中收音机里听到的，后来在网上一查，原来 NPR 举办 this I believe 征文活动已有50多年的历史了。什么时候俺也去投一稿。——终极问题：人家咋就没整出一套“审美疲劳”来涅？
"Pride and Prejudice" ，Elizabeth 的堂兄来她家相亲遭到拒绝，Elizabeth 的闺蜜Charlotte 得知此事后，主动接近那位堂兄，没多久俩人便结为夫妇。那位堂兄是一位在权贵面前卑恭屈膝唯唯诺诺的可怜人，Charlotte 则称得上是一位有文化有见解的“知性女性”，Elizabeth 后来去见Charlotte，看见他们一家丰衣足食，相亲相爱，堂兄还是以前唯喏的样子，只是脸上多了些幸福，Charlotte 依就平淡从容令人尊敬和热爱。——这是在小说中看到的最令我叹为观止的婚姻。
当小风风需要 change diaper 时，妈妈秀气的说：你去吧，爸爸温柔的道：你去吧，妈妈甜蜜地：划拳吧，爸爸温和的：好，妈妈霎时两眼露出聪慧的光芒：一次定胜负，输了的去。剪刀锤子布，剪刀剪破布。爸爸认命地抱着风风上楼去了，妈妈挪挪身子，换了一种更惬意的姿势接着与本镜坐而论道。——这是 live happily ever after 的第N 年。
T闺蜜家有一项让俺跌破眼镜片的国策：半夜上下班，晚间的飞机，都是不接也不送。饭局时，俺就没见过T蜜给自己夹过菜菜，俺一旁不经意的拿眼瞧着，一边想啊：这在外面挡风遮雨的，不会是手无夹菜之力的这位吧？T蜜曾免费向我兜售她的治家理论：老头子总是对的，我问：那你收了多少袋烂苹果了呀？T蜜很不屑道：切，我这不是在等着金子嘛！
——这，就是尘世间的婚姻。没有 fairy 没有 tale.
Sunday, June 3, 2007
一场关于freedom 的谈话摘要
有了国际声援，妈妈就有谱多了，不过这毕竟不是场风花雪月事，借着正午的人困马乏，先足足睡了一个小时的中午觉，再养了半个小时的神，觉得空前的清明，这中午觉有多少年没有过啦？不记得了。
（轻描淡写的开场了）：阿姨的回帖看了吗？
：看了，我知道 freedom 是有 price 的。
（前人流血牺牲这种 price 今天且按下不说，抛砖引玉或引蛇出洞先）：你认为那一种生命最 free?
：虫子？
：虫子他想干吗就干吗，想去哪就去哪，没有人要它干任何事情，好像是很 free 哦.
(点点头）：是的。
：我如果给妹妹100块钱，她会很高兴吗？
：她不知道钱干什么用的。
：很好，那么给你100块钱呢？
：我会高兴的。
：因为你知道可以拿钱去干很多你喜欢干的事，虫子知道 freedom 吗？
（函函虽没读过庄子，除了梦蝶一出，所以还不至于整出“你怎么知道虫子不知道呢？”这一套来，但小朋友们天生练就了“天人合一”的本事，by default, 虫鱼鸟兽跟他们就没什么区别，再加之又知道哪怕是小小的昆虫世界，也有他们自己的 communication 的方式，所以虫子们有没有读过自由价更高，还真不好说，只是埋个伏笔先。果然，函函沉吟不语。）
：虫子真的很自由吗？蚯蚓只能呆在泥土里，还得潮湿点的，如果不小心上了马路，它得赶紧找阴凉的地方，否则会晒死，ladybug 可以到处飞，但它一辈子能飞出多远呢，小鸟随时也会吃了他们。到底谁有更多的自由？
（不作声）
(语重心长）：我们人是有最多的自由的，并且获得自由只需一个条件，那就是你得努力，越努力你得到的自由就越多。ladybug 再努力的飞，也飞不到南极吧？其实任何种动物一辈子都很辛苦，他们得辛辛苦苦苦的找吃的，吃草的要 migrate 几千里去找到新的水源，小熊小老虎要在妈妈身边呆好几年，学会捕猎的本领，eagle 要抓兔子老鼠，容易吗？她在那里做窝？
：cliff.
: 为什么呢？ 那儿那么危险，小鹰可能会掉海里的，但悬崖上还是安全些，鹰妈妈出去捕食，就不用担心狐狸狼把小鹰叼走，你看，自然界里没有谁不用操心干活就可以过得很舒服的。
：spider 可以呆在 web 里不用干活。
：那是小spider 吧？如果你想做个spider，你也得考虑到作spider 妈妈，网谁织的？网破了怎么办？织个网容易吗？
：不知道。
：做房子修房子容易吗？
：不容易。
：那 spider 织网也不容易。哪一种动物没有自己的 responsibility 呢？
：妈妈，我想知道Lila 有什么responsibility 啊？
（这是个非常好的问题，得多展开展开）：当初你为什么没有领养一只小狗呢？因为你不喜欢狗，怕狗，如果小猫不 cute，你还会把她抱回家吗？Lila 经常在你身边 purr，蹭蹭你，她是想please 你，你给了她什么？一个睡觉的床，一些cat food 和水，她就知道要please 你。让她的owner 高兴, 是不是她的 responsibility 呢？做妈妈的给她的孩子的比你给 Lila的更多吧？小孩子是不是也该 please 他的妈妈呢？小孩子很cute,懂事，妈妈再辛苦也觉得是很值得的，如果小孩不听话呢？妈妈是不是会很失望? 你都8岁半了，是不是该想想你应该做的事，并且认真地做好，不抱怨呢？
……
说实在的，这样的老生常谈我是相当厌倦的，并且还无端的给自己加了很多的砝码，有人说，这样子养孩子，是给自己背上了另一付十字架。我是不是要增长点诸如博物学，政治学，社会学，甚至经济学方面的知识啊？否则剩饭来回的炒，自己都觉得在嚼蜡。
革命尚未成功，同志们还须努力啊。
（轻描淡写的开场了）：阿姨的回帖看了吗？
：看了，我知道 freedom 是有 price 的。
（前人流血牺牲这种 price 今天且按下不说，抛砖引玉或引蛇出洞先）：你认为那一种生命最 free?
：虫子？
：虫子他想干吗就干吗，想去哪就去哪，没有人要它干任何事情，好像是很 free 哦.
(点点头）：是的。
：我如果给妹妹100块钱，她会很高兴吗？
：她不知道钱干什么用的。
：很好，那么给你100块钱呢？
：我会高兴的。
：因为你知道可以拿钱去干很多你喜欢干的事，虫子知道 freedom 吗？
（函函虽没读过庄子，除了梦蝶一出，所以还不至于整出“你怎么知道虫子不知道呢？”这一套来，但小朋友们天生练就了“天人合一”的本事，by default, 虫鱼鸟兽跟他们就没什么区别，再加之又知道哪怕是小小的昆虫世界，也有他们自己的 communication 的方式，所以虫子们有没有读过自由价更高，还真不好说，只是埋个伏笔先。果然，函函沉吟不语。）
：虫子真的很自由吗？蚯蚓只能呆在泥土里，还得潮湿点的，如果不小心上了马路，它得赶紧找阴凉的地方，否则会晒死，ladybug 可以到处飞，但它一辈子能飞出多远呢，小鸟随时也会吃了他们。到底谁有更多的自由？
（不作声）
(语重心长）：我们人是有最多的自由的，并且获得自由只需一个条件，那就是你得努力，越努力你得到的自由就越多。ladybug 再努力的飞，也飞不到南极吧？其实任何种动物一辈子都很辛苦，他们得辛辛苦苦苦的找吃的，吃草的要 migrate 几千里去找到新的水源，小熊小老虎要在妈妈身边呆好几年，学会捕猎的本领，eagle 要抓兔子老鼠，容易吗？她在那里做窝？
：cliff.
: 为什么呢？ 那儿那么危险，小鹰可能会掉海里的，但悬崖上还是安全些，鹰妈妈出去捕食，就不用担心狐狸狼把小鹰叼走，你看，自然界里没有谁不用操心干活就可以过得很舒服的。
：spider 可以呆在 web 里不用干活。
：那是小spider 吧？如果你想做个spider，你也得考虑到作spider 妈妈，网谁织的？网破了怎么办？织个网容易吗？
：不知道。
：做房子修房子容易吗？
：不容易。
：那 spider 织网也不容易。哪一种动物没有自己的 responsibility 呢？
：妈妈，我想知道Lila 有什么responsibility 啊？
（这是个非常好的问题，得多展开展开）：当初你为什么没有领养一只小狗呢？因为你不喜欢狗，怕狗，如果小猫不 cute，你还会把她抱回家吗？Lila 经常在你身边 purr，蹭蹭你，她是想please 你，你给了她什么？一个睡觉的床，一些cat food 和水，她就知道要please 你。让她的owner 高兴, 是不是她的 responsibility 呢？做妈妈的给她的孩子的比你给 Lila的更多吧？小孩子是不是也该 please 他的妈妈呢？小孩子很cute,懂事，妈妈再辛苦也觉得是很值得的，如果小孩不听话呢？妈妈是不是会很失望? 你都8岁半了，是不是该想想你应该做的事，并且认真地做好，不抱怨呢？
……
说实在的，这样的老生常谈我是相当厌倦的，并且还无端的给自己加了很多的砝码，有人说，这样子养孩子，是给自己背上了另一付十字架。我是不是要增长点诸如博物学，政治学，社会学，甚至经济学方面的知识啊？否则剩饭来回的炒，自己都觉得在嚼蜡。
革命尚未成功，同志们还须努力啊。
Saturday, June 2, 2007
What Freedom Is..... What NO Freedom Is
Freedom is...
1. to not be bossed around unfairly by someone (king, lord, president,etc.)
2. to be put out of a place, like prison, which is more like being free
3. to have FUN!
4. to be carefree
5. to relax
6. to do what you wish to do
7. to be free
What NO Freedom is...
1. to be under the rule of a person
2. to be kept in a place like prison
3. to have no fun
4. to not be carefree
5. to not relax (even the tiniest bit!)
6. to not do what you wish to do
7. to not be free
--by Hannah
1. to not be bossed around unfairly by someone (king, lord, president,etc.)
2. to be put out of a place, like prison, which is more like being free
3. to have FUN!
4. to be carefree
5. to relax
6. to do what you wish to do
7. to be free
What NO Freedom is...
1. to be under the rule of a person
2. to be kept in a place like prison
3. to have no fun
4. to not be carefree
5. to not relax (even the tiniest bit!)
6. to not do what you wish to do
7. to not be free
--by Hannah